The message behind The Angry Birds Movie

This weekend, the #1 movie in America was The Angry Birds Movie.

Based on the once-popular mobile game and brought to life by movie makers’ rapidly drying well of ideas, the film tells the simple story of birds who are angry at pigs for stealing their eggs, and slingshotting themselves across the land to stop the pigs.

That’s the story behind the game, anyway. The movie tells a much deeper, darker tale. Continue reading

It’s time to end the tyranny of the thermometer

I was laying on the couch feeling terrible. My head throbbed, my sinuses felt like someone had shoved inside them a water balloon on the point of bursting, and everything just generally ached.

In short, I was sick and had a fever. My caring wife felt my forehead and said I felt warm, so she brought out a thermometer to see how bad it was.

That’s when everything went wrong. Continue reading

The perfect compromise for the open position on the Supreme Court

With the recent death of Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia, the political world has been in a frenzy.

Scalia was a conservative justice, and without him, the bench is evenly divided between four mostly liberal judges and four mostly conservative judges. The appointment of the next justice will have reverberations felt for a long time to come.

Naturally, this has caused violent arguments in Washington and beyond about what to do. Republicans in the Senate–who must provide consent on the presidential appointment, as laid out in the Constitution–have said they won’t even vote on any Obama nominee since it’s an election year.

Obama, for his part, has said “Come on, guys,” and “I’m sorry I did the same thing when I was in the Senate.”

Let’s see if we can work through some extreme scenarios to find the perfect compromise. Continue reading

Political Roundup: Rubio’s Canadian America

We don’t talk much politics around the SCS water cooler, mostly because talking politics is just about the worst thing anyone could possibly do.[1]

However, politics is playing a large part in the American consciousness right now, and there are some important things to discuss.

Let’s find out about the hidden message in Marco Rubio’s new “Morning again” ad. Continue reading

The folly of New Year’s resolutions

If you’re like most Americans, you spent some time coming up with resolutions to kick off 2016. And you’ve already failed at them. Whoops!

Now sure, you might be telling yourself that you haven’t failed, exactly, not yet anyway, that you’re going to get right back on them and everything will be fine. Just like every year, right?

But don’t despair. Let me tell you why it’s not your fault. Continue reading

The problem of Finn in Star Wars: The Force Awakens

Star Wars: The Force Awakens was a fun movie that did a fine job of the difficult task of balancing being an homage to the original movies and creating its own movie.

Part of its own creation is the introduction of the new main characters, notably Rey, Kylo Ren, and Finn. The characters were well portrayed, fully fleshed out characters that were separate from the original movies, and were an absolutely welcome addition to the franchise.

While I’ve seen criticisms of Rey for being too adept too quickly, and for Kylo Ren being too emo to take seriously as a major villain, my problem lies with Finn. His actions are problematic, not just for his own character, but for all of the viewers.

Here there be spoilers, so if you still haven’t seen the movie but plan to, probably stop now. Why did you open this in the first place? I mean, thanks, but it’s really not for you. Yet. Continue reading

Quick Update

Just wanted to let everyone know that I am succumbing to Mark Zuckerberg’s wily schemes and have created a Facebook page for Soft Core Sophistry. However, Facebook won’t let me say “Soft Core” in the URL (with spaces or without), so here is the link:

Just head on over there and hit the “Like” button both to validate my existence and also to follow along. It will update you when a new blog post goes up, as well as give you some extras, including things that aren’t long enough to merit a full blog post.

Share it friends, family, neighbors, and total strangers! Help make this grow! Then, when it becomes huge, you can turn your back on it, saying you liked it more when it was underground. Scoff at all the people who came to it late, after it went mainstream. Only you can make this happen.